Emperor Adam I, Editor
IMPERIAL HOUSEHOLD, Adammic Imperial Province – Yesterday, the Office of the Emperor celebrated the Aerican “niftyday” of Topin Wagglegammon by enacting a number of eccentric laws contained within Imperial Decree XV. They are:
-It is illegal to bring a giraffe over any north-facing border between Adammia and the UK
-All citizens of the Empire must be born in the Virgo Supercluster.
-All golf buggies in the Empire must be driven backwards.
-It is illegal to possess more than 10 grams of antimatter
-It is illegal to eat an Ethernet cable
-It is illegal to play the manuals on any organ with a thermometer
The Office of the Emperor told us, “It’s a shame that with such short notice we didn’t have time to organise a proper cultural event, and had to make do with legislation instead. Still, when we presented the Decree to the Council today they didn’t seem to have any problem with it… though Crown Prince Daniel did question the purpose of the laws.”
In the aforementioned Council meeting, the Emperor also presented Act 7 – the Weather Office Act 2013. This came after a BBC report was seen regarding a severe weather front about to hit Great Britain. Council passed the Act with 4 votes in favour and 4 not present, thus creating the Adammic Weather Office. This office reports on the weather to state media such as this newspaper. Their first report is below.
The Weather Report – by the Adammic Weather Office, Ministry of Information
A severe weather warning has been issued. The Adammic Home Provinces and the Creatuxia colony can expect heavy rain throughout the early hours of Monday morning. There is a low risk of flooding, but if there is any it would most likely affect Maternia province. Our citizens living in the south of the UK are advised to take caution as there will be extreme rainfall and winds early Monday morning. The storm should have passed by midday on Monday. Source – the UK Met Office; BBC News.