BILLYVILLE, Primoria – In the past hour, a force of paramilitary units under the command of Billy, mascot of the Adammic Army, has swooped on Primoria Province and invaded the Imperial Household, forcing the Emperor to abdicate. Immediately afterwards, the Ruling Council was dissolved and Billy declared himself Supreme Dictator of the Empire, which has been renamed to the People’s Republic of Adammia.
The coup d’etat saw very little fighting, with the Primoria Battalion overrun in mere minutes. Cpl. Michael Mellor, a veteran of the Skirmish of Astley Meadow, was sadly killed in the fighting. He was two days from retirement.
Billy has already set up a new, communist government. In Tytannia, wine production has been collectivised (whatever that means), with some citizens actually in support of the change. Access to some websites, such as craftanium.com, has been blocked for containing “pro-Imperial propaganda”. Meanwhile, a massive recruitment drive has begun for a new, revamped Adammic army, which has a surprising choice for its general – James Foster, the infamous perpetrator of the Skirmish of Tytannia last year. The government has announced plans to leave the GUM and form a new intermicronational organisation, which will be named “T.N.A.M.O.” (however, we still aren’t sure what the letters stand for). Furthermore, AISA’s rocket program has been seized and has been repurposed to carry explosives. A video released earlier, described by some as “disturbing”, depicts what appears to be cities such as Wrythe, Wyvern-stad and Rosewood being destroyed. “The time to explosion is coming,” said Alfie, a spokesperson for Billy, in a public statement.
Emperor Adam has fled the country, bound for nearby Erephisia, and was not available for comment. However, Crown Prince Daniel, who was Adam’s heir, was said to be “furious”. In an interview, Emperor Father Kevin said that he found the situation “very confusing”.
Seek wisdom and honour, and long live the People’s Republic!
UPDATE: April Fools!